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Molly the Camel
A new Marine Captain was assigned to an outfit in a remote post in the Iraqi desert. During his first inspection of the outfit, he noticed a camel hitched up behind the mess tent.

He asks the Sergeant why the camel is kept there. The nervous sergeant said, "Well sir, as you know, there are 250 men here on the post and no women. And sir, sometimes the men have "urges". That's why we have Molly the Camel."

The Captain says, "I can't say that I condone this, but I understand about "urges", so the camel can stay."

About a month later, the Captain starts having his own "urges". Crazy with passion, he asks the Sergeant to bring the camel to his tent. Putting a ladder behind the camel, the Captain stands on the ladder, pulls his pants down and has wild, insane sex with the camel.

When he's done, he asks the Sergeant, "Is that how the men do it?" "No, not really, sir... They usually just ride the camel into town where the girls are."

Poo.

A little girl walks in to the living room one Sunday morning while her Dad is reading the paper."Where does poo come from?" she asks.

The father, feeling a little perturbed that his 5 yr old daughter is already asking difficult questions, thinks for a moment and says: "Well you know we just ate breakfast?" "Yes," answers the girl. "Well the food goes into our tummies and our bodies take out all the good stuff, and then whatever is left over comes out of our bottoms when we go to the toilet, and that is poo."

The little girl looks shocked, and stares at him in stunned silence for a few seconds and then asks:

"And Tigger?"

Sperm Count.

An 85-year-old man went to his doctor's office to get a sperm count. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow." The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the! jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day. The doctor asked what happened and the man explained:

"Well, doc, it's like this - First I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing. Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then her left,still nothing. She tried with her mouth, ! first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, and still nothing. We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit and she even tried squeezin' it between her knees, but still nothing."

The doctor was shocked! "You asked your neighbor?" The old man replied, "Yep. And no matter what we tried, we still couldn't get the jar open."

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